Under the Rim

I was doing a load of laundry the other day when the mood struck to clean the washing machine.

Yes, clean the washing machine.

I never thought of that until a friend mentioned that she cleaned hers. Oh, you’re supposed to CLEAN the WASHING MACHINE? It doesn’t get clean every time you use it? I suppose not. Especially mine. It sees diapers and dog towels in addition to the normal everyday funk that gets on clothes.

Well, it hadn’t been cleaned in its life time – 7 whole years. That’s 7 years of gunk and goo that had built up. First, I noticed the dust and dirt on the lid – the washing machine lives in my garage, so the outer layer is thick and grows back quickly. (I do hope for an indoor laundry room someday. Ahhh…)

No biggie. Just a wipe down will do.

But what began as a basic wipe down quickly escalated into a full blown deep clean. I realized that I couldn’t get into the grooves with just my rag.  I needed something smaller.  An old toothbrush would do just the trick!  Then the fun really began - I started getting some really good funk out of the nooks and crannies. Oh, it felt SOOOO good to get it out. But I couldn’t reach a couple of spaces – my toothbrush just wasn’t small enough.

AHA!  The little wire brush that my MIL gave me (that I used to think would never get used- little did I know!). That did the trick! I got right in the little space between the lid and the opening – you know, that space where the lid hinges to the top of the washer.  That space is just right for collecting dirt and grime.  It didn’t stand a chance against my little wire brush and my neurotic cleaning frenzy. You see, once I start cleaning something – anything really – I notice all of the funk. At first it’s just the top layer of dust and dirt. But the closer I get, the more I see. Then I notice another layer of goo and gunk, and all sorts of good stuff that’s been growing and building up for way too long.  I end up on  my hands and knees, wading through who knows what.  But it's wonderfully, soul-satisfyingly clean in the end! 


I thought I had seen it all.


That’s when I looked under the rim.


Inside the washing machine, the space between the part that you put clothes into and the upper rim of it…well, that was a haven for some serious dog hair, orange colored grime, blobs of fuzzies and other nasty stuff. Now getting that out felt REALLY good.  I was ecstatic!
 It was at this point – when I was bent over sideways with my head in the washing machine holding my weapon (aka toothbrush) - that the Lord reminded me that it was Ash Wednesday, the first day of the season of Lent. All of a sudden it dawned on me that the recent revelation of old, unhealthy, sinful, yucky, gooey, patterns of relating that He had shown me, was a lot like my experience with the washing machine.


The closer I looked, the more gunk I saw.

Isn't that true of our lives?  The closer we look, the more we see how deeply we need His grace.  Although He’s ruthless about removing the gunk from our lives, He’s very tender and kind.  (Not as abrasive as I am when it comes to the nasty build up in my shower!)  He reminded me that I’m His beloved who is a glorious, broken jar of clay.  He began the good work in me and will be faithful to complete it.  He’s the one who led me to look under the rim of my soul to find some more goo that He wants to remove…so that I may be the woman He’s created me to be.


I would like to say it felt as good to look under the rim of my heart as it did the washing machine, but I'm not so sure about that one.  The gunk isn’t quite as easy to remove (even with a little wire brush in the hands of a Master Cleaner and a 30 minute deep clean!)


Even if it doesn’t “feel as good,” I trust that goodness is at work and goodness will abound.


May we all have the courage to look under the rim of our hearts this Lenten season.


Peace be with you,


Kristie

Is God Violent?

Is God violent? That was the subject of an article by Brian McLaren in a recent Sojourners magazine. He loosely defines violence as the intention to harm or kill. The article briefly speaks of the violence of the OT like that of the Flood in which Noah and his family were the only people saved from death by drowning. I wanted more from McLaren on these OT passages. He didn’t go down that road. When such great conundrums abound he said to look at Jesus – the God-Man - the very image of God; this seems wise. In looking at Jesus then, he concludes that God is not violent.


Atheists and many others (including myself as a follower of Jesus) struggle with the “God of the Old Testament” in comparison to Jesus. Certainly Jesus was strong and put people in their place. However, he never resorted to violence – as defined by the intention to harm or kill – neither in speech or action. He didn’t threaten or use fear as motivators. He told the Truth – and that either divided and repelled, or brought about repentance and new life.

I can deal with Jesus, but I have a really hard time with the God who wiped out entire races, killed babies, and slaughtered all sorts of animals.

So even while looking at Jesus, what are we to do with all of those OT passages that are filled with violence directed, even commanded, by God? The flood was God’s idea – His judgment against the wickedness of people. There are other times that God tells someone to wipe out an entire race of people – including the babies and the animals. Yes, these are happening at the hands of people, but God instructed the people to do it. As my dear husband pointed out, the sacrificial system in it of itself is quite bloody and violent; this, too, is a system instituted by God. Not to mention the Passover where the LORD kills every first born in Egypt so that there was not a home without wailing throughout the land (see Ex. 12). The OT is rife with examples of violence like these.

Then there is the Cross.

The Cross.

It doesn’t get much more gruesome than that.

God’s violence against His Son. The wrath of God poured out on Jesus. Jesus, the God-man. God took the violence upon Himself. Something we hear about all the time, but perhaps don’t often stop to ponder.

God enacted violence upon Himself.

I don’t know what to do with that. I don’t know what to do with a God who is so radical, so wild, so truculent.

I want to intellectualize, to theorize, to tell myself that He did it to eradicate sin. Yes, that is the truth. In the OT, He wiped out people and creatures to make a sacred, holy place for His people. I don’t pretend to really comprehend this. Yet there is more Truth to the story. The Truth of a God so in love with His creation that He’s not willing for ANYTHING to stop Him from restoring the perfect union that He intended.

I don’t conclude as McLaren does, that God is not violent. I simply confess that I just don’t get it – neither the depth of evil and sin nor the depth of His great love for us.